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Friday, 6 January 2017

Stubborn

4/1/2017
Rabu

The last?

Assalamualaikum , and every good evening guys. So how are you today? Everything okay? Ir doakan awak semua sihat selalu. Okay ? Ir sihat, cuma sejak minggu exam ni, mengada nak dedau bagai. So, it’s just small matter. Tak cukup rehat. Biasalah tu, nanti kalau dah dapat lelap sekajap, kebah la tu nanti.

Humming .

It’s almost nak masuk hari kelima untuk tahun 2017. and guess what, tomorrow is my final paper. And I am so excited. Rasa macam tak percaya je yang esok dah last day. Ramai yang balik awal, flight minggu ni semua. Hm, cemburunya balik awal. Nak juga balik awal. Haha, damn why the schedule exam keluar lambat? Kalau tak, boleh book tiket awal. Mungkin sebab nak temankan Nana. She is my roomate. Exam dia habis lambat. So that’s why balik lambat. Please thanks me because sacrifice my holidays because of you sayang. Hahahahahaha.

Sighing.

Actually, I still can’t accept the fact that our semester 1 is almost over. Yeah, after what have get through together, the assignments especially, full of nerve and kind of difficult, but still, we can make it. The whole class did those assignments well. What a very great and amazing drawings. Seems like they were gifted. Ir cemburu la guys. And still remember the assinment groups; ebx, art history, visual study, and softskill. Seronok sangat created memories dengan mereka. Yeah even though bukan denan semua Ir rapat, but to create memories doesn’t need orang yang kita dah kenal lama. Well, dengan orang baru pun kita boleh create memory. Sometimes, those little things la kita akan ingat dan terpahat dalam hati kita. Those little things la yang akan buat kita tersenyum.

Thinking;

Guys, guess what? Adda challenge me to get a selfie with someone. Who ? Who is that someone? Hmm, LKG. *short form* O M G . That’s crazy weh. LKG tu budak hot kot. Not just hot dalam kalangan the girls but also the lecturers. His drawing, sketches, and assignment, DAMN BLAST . why him babe? Memang tak lah aku menang the challange. But still, Why not I take that as an advantage for me. Bukan senang tau nak selfie dengan aboy tu. So, I agreed. Ir sahut cabaran dia. :) Tengok esok, Ir akan gain all the mighty spirit and get a selfie with him . No matter what . *Yeah I guess.

“Saranghamnida” “Bo go shi peo.”

It’s been almost a month since our last conversation. And only Allah knows how much I miss him. How much I try hard to forget him. Yes, it is new year know and everything is new; friends, chapter, semester, hope, wishes. But one thing you guys need to know that, I have never forget him. I make my day busy so that I hope I can stop thinking about him. But actually I can’t. During my study week, I study, I watch movies, I study back, then before I go to bed, he comes to my mind. Even during I wake up early to study, during 4.35 am, I still can thinking about him suddenly like that. And what can I do just sighing and stop doing my work. I take my phone and start to type message that I miss  him but then I erase back before continue my study. But guys, you never know how many times I whisper, “Ya-Allah, rindunya.” If I miss you, I stalk you. If I miss you, I ask Azra about you. If I miss you, I put you in my du’ah. If I miss you, I read back our old conversation. It’s sounds friendly and I love to read again and again. Because if it is you, I am never tired. Ir minta maaf sebab tibatiba menyepi. Ir minta maaf if you think that I am leaving you. It’s just, sampai bila Ir nak tebalkan muka Ir tegur you and you just act that you never care. Sampai bila Ir nak terhegehhegeh tanya khabar, tanya itu , tanya ini, like I am the only one need you here. Sampai bila Ir yang excited to tell the stories but you never , even once tell me about yours. ARA . ARA . I know that YOU DO NOT LIKE ME . I know that YOU DO NOT GIVE A DAMN ABOUT ME. But please, at least, appreciate me , can’t you? I do love you. I do love like crazy. Since the beginning I met you. Since we in our matriculation. Since I see you as an awful guy inside you. It is hurting to see you being with other girl, even just a friend. NAH, I HATE to see you with them especially her, that chinese girl. But I never do anything. I never harm her. I never bash her. I don’t talking anything. I just sit quietly and mind my own business. Then , now when I even gain my strength to talk to you, I even can’t express my feelings.I am afraid losing you so that I USED THIS FRIENDSHIP AS AN EXCUSE . I DO WANT TO TALK TO YOU ALL DAY LONG. I DO WANT TO HEAR ALL OF YOUR STORIES. I DO WANT TO CARE ABOUT YOU. YOU NEVER REALIZE HOW MUCH IMPORTANT YOU ARE TO ME. IT IS 2017, IT IS A NEW YEAR, BUT I AM STILL IN LOVE WITH THE SAME PERSON OVER AND OVER AGAIN . AND YOU NEVER KNOW HOW HARD I CONCEALED THESE FEELINGS CLOSELY. YET, I DO NOT KNOW HOW LONG I CAN STAND. PLEASE START TO REALIZE BEFORE YOU LOSING ME. BEFORE I DONE. BECAUSE IF I'M DONE, I DO NOT GIVE ANY DAMN ABOUT YOU.



Arasso?
Goodnight :)
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