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Wednesday, 14 September 2016

Misunderstanding

Assalamualaikum and good morning. Well in such along time I have never been update with my blog. So I don’t know what’s wrong with me today, yeah suddenly open up this blog and updsate the new post. Maybe I don’t have a real friend to talk with, means they will hear everything I said without talking back. 

Beasties,

What do I mean with real friend here? Well, Ir ada kawan dimana Ir can hanging out, chatting with and joking all around. But to find someone yang sanggup dengar luahan hati kau tanpa bagi any excuses, just listen. It bukannya nak buat apa pun, cuma Ir bukannya kuat sangat pun nak tanggung burden seorang diri. Why not as a friend, you just shut up and hear what I want to say.Bukan sharing is caring ke?

Typing….

I started to know the meaning of the word of friendship since I were studied in SM Teknik Jasin. I have friends which they stick with me no matter what. Not kuli, but friends, because I have never ask them to do my homework or such that thing. Like what friends should do, we shared various of story, from chapter to chapter. And when I am sick, they always have there for me. We take care each other. Daripada pinjamkan homework yang tak siap sampailah bagi makanan sebab kebulur sampailah masing-masing sakit dan teman pergi klinik sama-sama.

Aleyn and Pyqa.

Those both of them, my real friends. Sometime we laughing together, we working together, we eating together, sharing story together, advising each other together, playing together, study and fighting together, quarreling together, nagging, babbling, angry and no talk but then, Forgiving and sticking together again. They never easily get pissed off because of my jokes. Well, jangan cepat sentap sangat la. Being with them, I become tougher. Lagipun, Student Mechanical kan kena hardcore.I learn many things. Loyalty, trust, and sort of that kind. Dan Ir hargai sangat-sangat mereka kawan Ir dan pernah menjadi kawan Ir.

Well time passed by, and everything change.

When I managed to get myself in Matriculation , I feel like I want Aleyn and Pyqa also being here. I feel alone and scared. That kind of feelings haunt me until I know Syera and Nabel. I don’t need anyone else, I don’t need a lot more. It is enough just both of them. Yeah, the first time trying, I felt annoyed, irritated, and envy. They are smart, gorgeous and get along with the boys in the class. But then I asked myself, for how long I can stay alone like this with non-genius brain. Dengan dormmate yang can’t go along so well. So I learn to know them. How they study, how they make somekind of joke, how they eat, how they talk, sort of things and after months, I managed to get along with them.Especially Nabel, with her then I can get along with Yamm and later on Kenot. We do many kind of things together, shared story and everything. Not forget, Chia. I feel that I got back my Aleyn and Pyqa. Lagi-lagi dengan Nabel and Yam la. They are the best ever friends I had ever seen. And we applied the Sharing is Caring things. Later on, I can managed myself with Syera and my dormates. Yanai and Dayah. I get along wtih them so well for months. We do college activities together, and sports and races and all that kind stuff together. 

Sighing….

We were still friend until one day, I lost my friend, Dayah. She was too wonderful to let her go. Kind cute, funny, always make people laugh, don’t like boys so much, love to draws, love colours, and love to judge, but still I love her as my friend. But that day, I don’t know the reason and until today I can make it, we just don’t talk like that until the end of the day we should be there. Sedih? Kecewa? Yes, yet till now I can’t move on this guilty feeling.Bianhae Dayah. Saranghae :)

Buffering ...

Later on we have our really final exam. On the week of revision, Ir menerima satu tamparan teruks.  After all the trust i gave her, she is really disappointed me. I don't if she ever think of me when she doing that or not. Maybe she just think that she will be supported by those beast. Yelah, dia kan gorgeous, beast of genius. Orang gila pun pandai respect. But don't think she is  a perfect package, she can do that to me. Open table for judgement of myself. Dude, who are you to make me like that? You are the first ever bestfriend who managed to make i cried all over the week. Nabel were there, supporting her action. But then, after i ran away, she came. Give her apologized and  friendship back. Once, i really hate them included her, but then, i think back our old times, she just nice, better than the other. So I forgive her and officially sent apologized to the entire M2T9. I forgive them, but i will never forget what they had done to me. Can I hope one day they will be on my shoes? Nahh, i am not that type of girl. What is done, already done. When I said it over, means everything we just started from the first month till the last month just all over. Hands off darlings.

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Okay, for now situation, i've got friends. A lots. But, none of them were like mine before even for Kenot. She just nice but contrast with me. I just can't get along if it is about sharing story or opinion. We were just like quarreling around and i hate that feelings. Annoyed irritates and uneasy. But I am open. If she ask for haning out or buying something, okay then. Or maybe together not bring the drawing's stuff, okay then. I am just fine. I  just wondering, why not she is same like nabel, we were different but that different make us a perfect friendship. Oh my, I don't wanna think about that anymore. It just a burden. What can i say now, if i want to share story, only with my mom. Just my mom and my dad. No one else. It seems like i am a secretive person right? Duh, you don't know me, please don't judge. I hate unfair judgement. 

So that's all for now. My neck is hurts and i need to take my medicine. Those peeps and beasties, take care of yourself. Do love you :)

Assalamualaikum and goodbye .

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